It’s time I come clean. I’m throwing my lot in with the Catholics.
I’ve decided to formally withdraw my ordination process from the UCC (I was “in discernment” with a local congregation, but not yet with the conference). I have applied for ordination with the North American Old Catholic Church. They are an independent Catholic denomination.
In my process through the UCC (some of which I have talked about on this blog) it seemed I was hitting roadblock after roadblock. (And I want to make clear, here, that my issue is with the denominational structure and not the church in which I was in care. They were supportive.) Yet it wasn’t just the roadblocks, I was also filled with the sense that something was wrong; wrong with the process, wrong with my attitude toward the process, simply wrong. I was frustrated at the extra (at least) $2000.00 that the ordination process was going to cost me ($1000 for psychological testing and $1000 for a polity course that I didn’t take in seminary). I was frustrated over the fact that the psych testing routinely fails transgender people simply for being trans*, that the folks administering the tests often make up stuff about trans* people histories or are uneducated about trans* issues, and that I would have to advocate for myself emotionally and mentally in what was already going to be a trying process. I was frustrated that I felt like I was going to have to lie about my theology in order to please the denomination (I have found that older, straight, cisgender people don’t deal well when you start talking about the queer Christ). And finally I felt that the UCC isn’t interested in calling or ordaining people to non-traditional ministry (non-traditional being anything that isn’t an established parish). Granted, I wasn’t into the process so there is a chance that all of the above might have been wrong, but I have heard enough stories from people that I trust to be worried. But the UCC seemed like the only denomination that would ordain me.
The Archbishop of the NAOCC reached out to me on twitter asking me to help spread the word that the Old Catholics existed and that they were happy to ordain trans* people. We started talking more about the denomination and I thought it sounded great but I still wasn’t sure that I would fit. I don’t come from the Catholic tradition (although I have a great love for so much of it), I was nervous about hierarchy, and I was nervous that my theology wouldn’t be a good fit. But in our conversations he put my fears to rest.
I received the application for ordination and had it in the mail less than a week later. I was dragging my feet for over two years with the UCC. With this something clicked. It didn’t feel wrong, instead it felt (and feels) like a very, very good fit.
The NAOCC not only respects the theology I hold but feels that it will be a good addition to the denomination. They are ordaining me to the work I feel called to do and the work I am already doing. (Namely Camp Osiris and House of the Transfiguration.) They are all about new parish ministries and clergy development. The Old Catholics ordain women, queer folks, and married people. They keep the hierarchy to a minimum. Their psych testing is free and done by someone who literally wrote a book on therapy with trans* clients. They are a progressive social justice church. It’s the first time I read a series of position statements and was able to nod my head in agreement to all of them.
I know this probably sounds like a bit of an advertisement, but I have been feeling so hopeless about ordination for such a long time that this opportunity feels amazing. It’s a huge blessing to be excited about the process, to be feeling supported and lifted up, to feel seen and heard by the people who will be doing the ordaining. The end thing is that the Old Catholics are recognizing and affirming the call I already have instead of making me fit into an idea of “calling” and “vocation” that doesn’t make sense for me.
If all goes according to the (tentative) plan that is in place, I’ll be ordained to the diaconate at the end of May, hopefully at the Philadelphia Transgender Health Conference. Then I’ll be ordained to the priesthood in November (or thereabouts) out here in Minnesota. I am thrilled to be embarking on this journey and happy to have found a place that (even though new) feels like home.
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What I’ve heard about the NAOCC is awesome, and I’m so glad you’ve found a niche where you’re valued for all you are and all you believe. So many traditional ordination processes seem to want to shave bits and pieces off their ordinands to make them fit, which is *so* not the way to have a healthy clergy. You have my continuing prayers as you move through this hopefully much more congenial process!
thanks so much! I am feeling really good about it and about the process.
Greetings, My Sister! I am so happy to hear of your process. Thank you for sharing it “out loud” with all of us.
I am likewise excited to hear more of, see more of and watch more of the completion of the process God has begun in you!
Much love and prayer support in your ministry! Again, welcome to the NAOCC.
Thank you so much for the welcome! (Just a note, I am male. I know it’s sometimes hard to tell on the internet, but just wanted to correct. Thanks!)
This is fantastic – I’m so glad that it is falling into place! Especially in a way where you are ordained into the ministry that you are called to. I look forward to being ecumenical clerical colleagues!
Great Site. I want to say more. At work now. Many blessings!!!